Honestly, why is this such a big deal? Its just some guy cleaning a bedroom turned music studio. Where is the hook? What's the actual story? The story is this. The story is every day when my body proved too much to take care of The story is every night when my space turned to landfill The story is how depression transforms not just a body but everything around it. Depression is a big bang. It is a bomb set alight in this corpse of a body made into fighter jet And this room be my testing ground What is a room If it is not just practice for how to destroy Everything else And what I mean is Depression has always been the destruction
But it is not all at one time Depression is the slow tsunami It is the tide rising inch by inch until Inland becomes beach Until mountain becomes molehill Until everything in its wake gets pulled in by tide Depression is volcano It is a slothful fire Slow cooking the ground I walk on Making all I have held dear A blanket of ash A room full of artifacts And some days I wish it would just be eruption And explosion And a swift supernova And here I am A creeping inferno An advancing forest fire Both contained And out of control And consuming the last of the Dried grass And what I mean is Depression pulls the energy out of me The way a black hole makes its very existence A snare Depression is a black hole Not just the darkness of it It’s the pulling The way its grasp holds tight Its fingers press in Bruising my wrists and ankles Making my hands and feel feel like the Anvils they so often have been in the past So why is this a big deal? Because when an island cleans after a hurricane The population can once again find home Because there is privilege in being able to remove the sign reading "Will open after storm" Because even the little victories are God's way of saying "Here is your rainbow" Your promise that The storm may return The trial may come But the end always follows If depression is the story This is the finale This is the finally This is happy ending and sequel in one This Is what Victory Looks like
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